As promised we're going to have a few posts on our adoption journey. We'll take you through why we decided upon adoption, why we chose China, why we chose our agency as well as our trek through the process itself. For this first post, we'll answer the basic question of why expand our family through adoption?
Every since childhood Beth has wanted to adopt a child. She has always believed that it is something that G-d has wanted her to do. For Howard, adoption was never something he had given serious thought to until he met Beth. As our relationship developed and we moved closer to marriage the topic of children was discussed. We both agreed that we wanted more than one child but no more than three. We also agreed that it would be nice to have at least one boy and one girl although Beth really really wanted a girl. The next item to be discussed was how we were going to bring these children into our lives and this is where the topic of adoption came up.
After much discussion we decided to first have biological children and then look into adoption. In 2005 we had our first child, Benjamin. It was a difficult and high risk pregnancy. Beth was sick for 7 months to the point that she was put on anti-nausea medication. At 36+ weeks, Beth developed HELLP syndrome and since her life was at risk they did an emergency induction and Benjamin was born. Luckily, he was relatively healthy (just a short visit to the NICU) and Beth recovered.
Maybe with this first pregnancy G-d was trying to tell us something (like to adopt) but we didn't listen and were pregnant again with #2 in late 2007. The second pregnancy went better that the first but it was not without its problems. There were some complications along the way but nothing too serious. Beth was only nauseous for 5 months this time. When it came time to find out the sex we were hoping for a girl (especially Beth) but it seems G-d had other plans. A few months later Eli was born but not without excitement.
As difficult as pregnancy #1 was, labor & delivery was relatively easy. Eli however, had his own agenda. This delivery was not so easy, actually it was really difficult and we were very close to an emergency C section. Thankfully, it did not come to that and our Eli was born. He was healthy and Beth was exhausted.
At this moment that we understood that if we were going to have any more children it was not going to be biologically as G-d had made it pretty clear that Beth was not meant to get pregnant again. It was then that we decided our next family addition will be through adoption.
Story to be continued in a future post...
Now for the update.
As of 10/13 here's our wait statistics:
Referred through: 3/28/2006
Current wait: 43 months
Projected referral date: 11/13/2012
Projected months remaining to referral: 37
Remember, these are simple projections based on extrapolating the current wait forward. Check out the Rumor Queen (link at top) for more thorough projections
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Thursday, September 24, 2009
New Years 3 Times a Year
With Rosh Hashana (Jewish New Year) being this week we've thought it be a good time to mention one of the ways we intend to incorporate Chinese culture into our family once Baby China Girl is here. We will be a family that celebrates New Years 3 times a year. That being the Rosh Hashana, New Year's Eve and Chinese New Year.
We feel that it is important embrace aspects of the Chinese culture into our family once Baby China Girl is here. At this point, we're not exactly sure of everything we're going to do (more posts on that in the future) but one thing we will do is to celebrate Chinese New Year as a family. How are we exactly going to do this we're not sure yet, possibilities involve attending Chinese New Year celebrations in the area and hosting a Chinese New Year party at our home. This would involve lots of family, friends, and ethnic food and dress. Hmm..doesn't sound much different than the Jewish New Year (minus the praying) now does it?
Now for the update.
As of 9/13 here's our wait statistics:
Referred through: 3/24/2006
Current wait: 42 months
Projected referral date: 10/13/2012
Projected months to referral: 37
We feel that it is important embrace aspects of the Chinese culture into our family once Baby China Girl is here. At this point, we're not exactly sure of everything we're going to do (more posts on that in the future) but one thing we will do is to celebrate Chinese New Year as a family. How are we exactly going to do this we're not sure yet, possibilities involve attending Chinese New Year celebrations in the area and hosting a Chinese New Year party at our home. This would involve lots of family, friends, and ethnic food and dress. Hmm..doesn't sound much different than the Jewish New Year (minus the praying) now does it?
Now for the update.
As of 9/13 here's our wait statistics:
Referred through: 3/24/2006
Current wait: 42 months
Projected referral date: 10/13/2012
Projected months to referral: 37
Saturday, August 8, 2009
TB Petition
We're not usually ones to get political but this is important. On July 1 the CDC started requiring TB testing for all "immigrant" children over the age of 2 from China and Ethiopia. If the child tests positive they cannot enter the U.S. until they test negative even if they are no longer contagious. This could take anywhere from several weeks to six months, significantly complicating a family's trip to adopt a child.
Here's our beef, this new rule only applies to children being adopted from China and Ethiopia. If a family were to have a biological child in say China, they would not be subject to this rule. Anyone else traveling to the U.S. is not subject to this rule. This is blatant discrimination on the part of the CDC against internationally adopted children.
The reason we bring this up now is because there is a family currently in China who's legally adopted daughter tested positive for TB. To make a long story short, they had to leave her behind because the CDC would not approve her visa to enter the U.S. To read more about this family check out their blog here. Although we understand this family's situation, we talked about it and if this happened to us one of us would stay behind with our daughter for as long as needed. We know this is not an option for everyone but luckily we both work jobs that would allow this (thank you Uncle Sam and HCPSS).
There is a online petition that we urge everyone to sign that urges the CDC to alter its policy on TB testing. Beth and I both signed it. You can get to it here.
Now for the update. Things are going even slower now but are expected to speed up soon per the Rumor Queen, lets hope.
As of 8/8 here's our wait statistics:
Referred through: 3/22/2006
Current wait: 41 months
Projected referral date: 9/13/2012
Projected months to referral: 37
Here's our beef, this new rule only applies to children being adopted from China and Ethiopia. If a family were to have a biological child in say China, they would not be subject to this rule. Anyone else traveling to the U.S. is not subject to this rule. This is blatant discrimination on the part of the CDC against internationally adopted children.
The reason we bring this up now is because there is a family currently in China who's legally adopted daughter tested positive for TB. To make a long story short, they had to leave her behind because the CDC would not approve her visa to enter the U.S. To read more about this family check out their blog here. Although we understand this family's situation, we talked about it and if this happened to us one of us would stay behind with our daughter for as long as needed. We know this is not an option for everyone but luckily we both work jobs that would allow this (thank you Uncle Sam and HCPSS).
There is a online petition that we urge everyone to sign that urges the CDC to alter its policy on TB testing. Beth and I both signed it. You can get to it here.
Now for the update. Things are going even slower now but are expected to speed up soon per the Rumor Queen, lets hope.
As of 8/8 here's our wait statistics:
Referred through: 3/22/2006
Current wait: 41 months
Projected referral date: 9/13/2012
Projected months to referral: 37
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Baby China Girl Name
Recently, Benjamin asked if his baby sister from China has a name. The answer is not yet. We have talked about names but haven't agreed upon one yet. As per our history, the name will remain secret until we have the referral and have to put her name on the paperwork thus making it official and unchangeable. We did tell Benjamin that he(and Eli) will be the first to know the name when the time comes.
That begs the question of whether we're going to keep her Chinese name and so forth. We are planning to keep her Chinese name as her middle name and name her first name after a dead relative according to Jewish tradition. She will also be given a Hebrew first and middle name following the same tradition. However, she won't get her Hebrew name until she is officially converted to Judaism (we'll have a post on that another time).
Now for the wait update:
As of 7/13 (our 2 month wait mark) here's our wait statistics:
Referred through: 3/20/2006
Current wait: 40 months
Projected referral date: 8/13/2012
Projected months to referral: 37
That begs the question of whether we're going to keep her Chinese name and so forth. We are planning to keep her Chinese name as her middle name and name her first name after a dead relative according to Jewish tradition. She will also be given a Hebrew first and middle name following the same tradition. However, she won't get her Hebrew name until she is officially converted to Judaism (we'll have a post on that another time).
Now for the wait update:
As of 7/13 (our 2 month wait mark) here's our wait statistics:
Referred through: 3/20/2006
Current wait: 40 months
Projected referral date: 8/13/2012
Projected months to referral: 37
Sunday, June 14, 2009
The Wait Begins
Now that our paper chase has ended we have a lot of time to kill while we wait. For here on out, we intend to use this blog to update everyone on "the wait" and to discuss various issues relating to our paper chasing experience and other adoption related issues such as attachment, Chinese culture, room renovations etc. We hope to post at least once a month to at least provide an update to "the wait" if nothing else.
So, for the first time as of today's post here's our wait statistics:
Referred through: 3/14/2006
Current wait: 39 months
Projected referral date: 7/13/2012
Projected months to referral: 37
How did I come up with this? Simple. Using MS Excel, I calculated the difference between the current date and referred through date to calculate the current wait. Then I extrapolated out the current wait from our LID to get a projected referral date. Finally, calculated the difference between that date and the current date to get our remaining wait. Pretty fancy huh.
Of course this is all based on current data (courtesy of the Rumor Queen) and could very well change for the better or worse. Also, remember there is a several week lag from when you get your referral until you travel to China.
That's all for now folks! Maybe things will speed up by the next post. Most recent rumor is that they are matching the rest of March but we shall see!
So, for the first time as of today's post here's our wait statistics:
Referred through: 3/14/2006
Current wait: 39 months
Projected referral date: 7/13/2012
Projected months to referral: 37
How did I come up with this? Simple. Using MS Excel, I calculated the difference between the current date and referred through date to calculate the current wait. Then I extrapolated out the current wait from our LID to get a projected referral date. Finally, calculated the difference between that date and the current date to get our remaining wait. Pretty fancy huh.
Of course this is all based on current data (courtesy of the Rumor Queen) and could very well change for the better or worse. Also, remember there is a several week lag from when you get your referral until you travel to China.
That's all for now folks! Maybe things will speed up by the next post. Most recent rumor is that they are matching the rest of March but we shall see!
Monday, May 18, 2009
We got our LID!
Today we were informed by our agency that our login date (LID) is May 13, 2009! What this means is that our dossier has been officially "logged in" at CCAA and is now in the queue for review. Not much has changed since our last post as they have reviewed dossiers logged in through April 2007 and referred through March 8, 2008. At the moment, with the current wait of 38+ months we would get our referral sometime in July 2012.
Although we are excited to finally get a LID, it is a little frustrating that it took so long as our dossier was sent to China on April 21. However, we have expected to expect the unexpected in this process so it is what it is. Hopefully, the wait will get shorter but whatever it is will be worth it in the end.
Our thoughts are currently with all those families who are so close to a referral but whose wait has been extended due to the swine flu scare. The most recent expected batch of referrals seem to have been delayed until the swine flu scare settles down. We hope this won't happen to us!
Although we are excited to finally get a LID, it is a little frustrating that it took so long as our dossier was sent to China on April 21. However, we have expected to expect the unexpected in this process so it is what it is. Hopefully, the wait will get shorter but whatever it is will be worth it in the end.
Our thoughts are currently with all those families who are so close to a referral but whose wait has been extended due to the swine flu scare. The most recent expected batch of referrals seem to have been delayed until the swine flu scare settles down. We hope this won't happen to us!
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Dossier to China!
Our adoption agency called yesterday to let us know that our dossier was back from the Chinese Consulate and will be sent on to China! What this means is that it passed authentication at the Consulate with no problems (phew!) and was returned to Bethany's HQ in Michigan. The next step is that it is sent off to the China Center for Adoption Affairs (CCAA) in China to be logged in and translated into Chinese. Once logged in the real wait begins. At last report they have referred children to families with login in dates (LID) as of 3/8/06 so the wait continues to increase.
We'll get another phone call from Bethany once we have a login date. Hopefully, we'll have a login date sometime next week but may not be informed of it for a few weeks. The reason we won't have a LID before next week is because Bethany is holding our dossier until they have a few to send (to cut back on costs) but more so until Eli turns a year old (on Friday!). Yes, although the wait is 3+ years CCAA requires that your youngest child is 1 before your dossier can be logged in.
Next, there is one more "review" that our dossier goes through. This is the review by CCAA to officially approve you for adoption (on the China end). At some point our dossier will pass through CCAA's review room where it will be closely scrutinized. They might question a few things (not likely as Bethany is very thorough) and then approve it for adoption. Then, you wait until can be matched with a child. Right now, they have reviewed dossiers with LIDs through March 2007 expected to speed up soon.
We'll post again once we have our LID!
We'll get another phone call from Bethany once we have a login date. Hopefully, we'll have a login date sometime next week but may not be informed of it for a few weeks. The reason we won't have a LID before next week is because Bethany is holding our dossier until they have a few to send (to cut back on costs) but more so until Eli turns a year old (on Friday!). Yes, although the wait is 3+ years CCAA requires that your youngest child is 1 before your dossier can be logged in.
Next, there is one more "review" that our dossier goes through. This is the review by CCAA to officially approve you for adoption (on the China end). At some point our dossier will pass through CCAA's review room where it will be closely scrutinized. They might question a few things (not likely as Bethany is very thorough) and then approve it for adoption. Then, you wait until can be matched with a child. Right now, they have reviewed dossiers with LIDs through March 2007 expected to speed up soon.
We'll post again once we have our LID!
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